AvSport of Lock Haven: The One That I Fly

AvSport of Lock Haven -- 353 Proctor Street, Lock Haven PA 17745

The One That I Fly
Lyrics Copyright © 2011 by Prof. H. Paul Shuch
Sung to the tune of "The One on the Right Was On the Left" © 1965 by Jack Clement

I couldn't wait to venture to Oshkosh Air Adventure,
To see ten thousand airplanes from all across this land.
There's really no denying I'm quite in love with flying.
And yet, despite my trying, I could not understand.

The ones on the floats were on the water
And the ones on the wheels were on the grass.
The Cub and the Champ were on the ramp,
And the one that I fly... is a spam can.
I first encountered friction at Ripon Intersection,
For all ten thousand airplanes were lining up to land.
Controllers gave directions, and readbacks brought corrections,
But spoken at a cadence I could not understand.

The ones on the floats were on the water
And the ones on the wheels were on the grass.
The Cub and the Champ were on the ramp,
And the one that I fly... did a ground loop.
I'm usually a loner, but not there at Camp Scholler.
I joined ten thousand pop tents stretched all across the land.
The rain came on as showers, that just dragged on for hours.
The planes and tents and flowers sunk in the muddy sand.

The ones on the floats stayed on the water
And the ones on the wheels were in water too.
The Champ and the Cub were like a bathtub,
And the one that I fly... was drowning.
Quite early the next morning, with very little warning,
The sun brought global warming, that dried up all the land,
In time for us to all go, to the scheduled airshow.
Gazing skyward from below, the flying stunts were grand.

The ones on the floats splashed on the lake
And the ones in the grass got moving fast.
The Cub and the Champ came out of the damp,
And the one that I fly... was inverted.
I waited for an hour on line to use the shower,
To wash off grime I'd gathered from all across this land.
I then took my clean body to find a porta-potty,
However, the supply was exceeded by demand.

The ones without chocks are at the dock
And the ones in the grass have yelled "Clear Prop!"
The Cub and the Champ have left the ramp,
And the one that I fly... is getting fueled.
Now a Skyhawk and an Archer are lined up for departure.
We'll soon be off and winging to all across this land.
We sit here burning avgas while someone does a low pass.
But we're all flying first class, and so we understand.

That the ones on the floats have cleared the moat
And the ones on the wheels are on the roll.
The Champ and the Cub have joined the club,
And the one that I fly... will be back next year.

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